


Scared to make a connection

by queenofseventeen



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: F/M, allison and seth coming together for the first time, enjoy, it's sad, mcd here because im following canon, there's major fluff in here, theres also major angst at the end
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-18
Updated: 2018-03-18
Packaged: 2019-04-04 05:44:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14013447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queenofseventeen/pseuds/queenofseventeen
Summary: When Seth first meets Allison he can't take his eyes of her and he would never deserve her, little does he know that beautiful girls are the loneliest.





	Scared to make a connection

**Author's Note:**

> based on the song beautiful girls are the loneliest by McBusted, recommend listening to it while reading.

Seth sat next to Santiago and Young waiting for the new recruits to pile into the room. Coach had recruited three girls and three boys.  _ Girls.  _ Seth hadn’t wanted to believe it. They didn’t need girls to win, they needed man. People strong enough to get the ball from one side of the court to the other.

 

_ You think she's out of your league _

_ And it plays on your mind _

_ Look around, look around, look around _

_ She's one of a kind _

 

The door opened and first Wymack came in. Behind him followed three girls. One dark skinned, one with bright white and rainbow colored hair and, he didn’t even know how to describe the last girl. She sported a tan and seven inch heels, he was sure that if he stood up she’d be almost as tall as he was. Her hair looked like sunshine and her lips were colored a pale pink. 

He wanted to kiss her. If this was a club he’d try to kiss her, not afraid of rejection when she wasn’t even able to see him in the dark. But right now… The girl could see him in the fluorescent light. Her eyes skimmed over the six guys already in the locker room. She held his eyes, scoffed and turned to her nails. A bright red.

 

_ If she's all by herself and she's looking at you _

_ You gotta build up the courage to do what you gotta do _

 

The first time Seth saw Allison by herself was one afternoon before practice. He needed new bedsheets. The store had been almost abandoned at that time in day and it helped calm him down. With Exy starting up again he needed to wane off the drugs for a bit. Abby would flay him for ruining his chance to play. He’d flay himself. Exy was all he had left after the mediocre grades of his second semester. 

He saw Allison a couple rows further and pinched his arm. He could do this. She was on his team, he just had to say hello. That couldn’t be too hard, could it? 

 

_ But you see your reflection _

_ And you fill up with doubt _

_ And the words don't come easy to the girl who stands out _

_ No the words don't come easy to the girl who stands out _

 

He looked into the mirror next to him. His hair was a mess, his shirt was wrinkled and a weird grey color, his sweater a slightly different grey. He couldn’t talk to Allison looking like this. 

She looked perfect. Styled like she was going to a fashion show but that’s how she had grown up, right? Rich and famous. Seth looked into the mirror again and sighed. He couldn’t talk to Allison. He didn’t deserve her. So he walked away ignoring her when he walked past. 

 

_ You know I think it's obvious _

_ Beautiful girls are the loneliest _

_ So next time you see one that you can't resist _

_ Remember, beautiful girls are the loneliest _

_ Beautiful girls are the loneliest _

 

He found her outside the science building one day in fall. Her back to the wall, crouched low and hands in front of her face. He shouldn’t be there. He shouldn’t be seeing her cry but he couldn’t help. How could she look even prettier like this. It was unfair and he was so unworthy of her. He with his addictions, anger, stupid face. Yet he couldn’t leave her like this.

He slowly walked closer. “Allison,” he said when he reached her. He laid a hand on her shoulder and felt her flinch but she didn’t pull away. “Hey, Allison, what’s wrong? Do I need to cut someone’s hands off?” He joked lightly. He heard the hitch in her breath and hoped it was a laugh. He put his hands on hers and peeled them away. 

“Allison, talk to me.” She looked up. Those blue eyes burning behind the tears. They were looking into his brown ones. 

“My mother called,” she ground out. “Asked if I was finally done fucking up my life. Said that I could still change majors this early in the year.” Seth furrowed his brow. He thought her life was great. “My father and her want me to quit Exy.” 

“Do you like Exy?” He asked. She nodded a bit confused. “Than don’t give it up. Take it from someone who only has Exy. When you find something you like don’t ever give it up.”

“Than why haven’t you asked me out yet?” Seth softly, carefully pressed the palm of his hand against her cheek wiping away a tear.  _ You’re too good to be true,  _ was what he thought. But he only shrugged.

 

_ So you move a step forward _

_ But you take two steps back _

_ Freaking out, freaking out, freaking out _

_ And it goes on like that _

_ Scared to make a connection _

_ Afraid to break down the walls _

_ It couldn't be any harder _

_ It should be no sweat at all _

 

Seth had tried to be with Allison. He really had. He had taken her on dates, given her flowers. He had held her hand and asked how she were everytime they met. Still after only a month she had walked away. He was back to his antidepressants, he was back to being alone. He sat down a bit away from the bar and swallowed his meds. He didn’t even have it in him to look around, maybe after they kicked in.

When he went to pick up his baco to swallow them down he found it gone. He looked up from the tan, slender fingers to an arm and a body and a face he barely remembered from his dreams. What was she doing here? Someone like Allison shouldn’t be spending her time in a lousy bar. 

He shouldn’t be spending it alone but he had had another fight with Young and Santiago and he didn’t want to stay in his room. “Don’t, Seth,” she said. She sat down next to him still keeping the glass out of reach. “You’re not doing that, not when I’m here.”

“You weren’t here.”

“That isn’t a reason to poison yourself.” She carted a hand through his curls and took a sip of his drink, her nose scrunched up. “On the other hand this drink is poison without the meds.” She gave him a small smile. “I came by to apologize. It wasn’t right for me to walk out last week. I should’ve listened to you.” No, no she shouldn’t be apologizing. 

“Don’t. Alli, you did nothing wrong. I’m- I was holding you back from your studies and the girls.” She brushed a finger over his dark skin. 

“That’s where you’re wrong. You don’t hold me back. You encourage me to do what’s on my mind but my mind isn’t always right.” Seth didn’t understand all of it. But he would try to. For her he would try. So he took her hand, watched her set the drink down and walked with her over the campus until they could see the sun rise.

 

_ You know I, I think it's obvious _

_ Beautiful girls are the loneliest _

_ So next time you see one that you can't resist _

_ Remember, beautiful girls are the loneliest _

_ Beautiful girls are the loneliest _

 

Seth thought back to their last fight. Allison had been reading her magazine and saw news about her parents. Seth hadn’t allowed her to buy something expensive just to spite her parents. In the end he knew shopping was like therapy for her but on the other hand one only had that much money and Allison wanted to make a clothes brand after college. He couldn’t do right either way. 

He wrapped his arms around her when she sat down in his lap. Her roommates had left the dorm a while ago and wouldn’t be back until later that night. Time enough to sneak in a couple kisses, maybe a little more. Only Allison wasn’t quite there with her mind.

“Do you remember when you found me last fall?” She looked down on him. He fingers smoothing over the lines in his face and her thumb falling on his bottom lip. He pressed a kiss to the pad before answering.

“I thought it impossible for you to look beautiful even when you cried. But here you are proving to me that there will never be a moment in which you’ll ever be undesirable.” He waited a beat before asking, “What were you crying about?”

“It kicked in then. That my parents disowned me, I mean.” She played with his fingers. “I thought they loved me for more than my face. I was lonely.” Seth pulled his hand away to wrap his arms around her. He pulled her into his chest and brushed a hand through her hair. 

“You don’t have to be alone anymore. I’m going to be here for you. Always.” He looked at the far wall until he felt her eyes on him once more. “I mean it, Alli. I’ll always be there for you. I’m going to make something of my life and give you the one you deserve. Even if we fight sometimes, I don’t want to lose you. You don’t have to be alone anymore.” She nodded and didn’t say anything else but they had never felt so close.

When Dan and Renee walked into the room later they found the pair curled up on the couch together, fully clothed and fast asleep.

 

_ You know I think it's obvious _

_ Beautiful girls are the loneliest _

_ So next time you see one that you can't resist _

_ Remember, beautiful girls are the loneliest _

_ Beautiful girls are the loneliest _

 

Seth and Allison had been on again of again for years but he knew that if he kept seeing Bee, if he kept trying he could be great for Allison. He’d give her the life she deserved. Complete with glitter and glamour. That’s what he had promised her.

It was why Allison always checked his pockets for his meds when they went out with friends. It was why she never really wanted to break up with him even if she knew they should. She knew they never worked out on the long term. 

Allison waited by the bar with Madison. Seth had only been away for ten minutes he’d be right back, give her a hug and a kiss and scowl at her for worrying. He wasn’t stupid. His meds were at his dorm. 

Only ten minutes turned into fifteen and she did worry. She had taken a bit too many shots already but she could still handle walking in her tall heels. She loved them. Seth loved them. Loved that he didn’t have to bend down to capture her lips. 

She was drunk enough to not care she was entering a man’s restroom. Besides she was Allison Reynolds, what would they do. 

Allison hadn’t been lonely for years. Had always been with Seth, Renee or Dan. Had always had them to lean on. 

Allison hadn’t been lonely for years.

Hadn’t been lonely.

Lonely.

She screamed when she saw Seth lying on face down on the floor in his own puke. She had checked for his meds hadn’t she. She had checked. He couldn’t do this. Wouldn’t do this. He had promised her. 

She sunk on her knees and shook his shoulders. “Seth,” she said. “Seth.” A little louder the second time. Her fingers scrambled for his neck for his pulls and came back empty. “Seth!” she screamed. “Someone call an ambulance!”

“Seth,” she sobbed this time. He had promised her a bright future. A future together. He couldn’t be gone. Shouldn’t be. 

_ You don’t have to be lonely anymore.  _

 

_ Beautiful girls are the loneliest _

**Author's Note:**

> @queen-of-seventeen on tumblr


End file.
